Loss of a Friend

Yesterday, somewhat by force, I lost a dear friend.  This morning at about 2 am when I woke up experiencing a little pain and discomfort from the loss, I knew I needed to write about this experience.

It is hard to say how long this dear, reliable friend has been apart of my life.  It seems she has always been here but in reality, she has been there in every smile and bite as far back as I can recollect.  First, there was a “baby” one and then there was this permanent one which has been with me for at least 40 years so she knows me well.

What happened, you ask?  About 6 years ago I had my first chip incident at La Hacienda Ranch where a chip went astray and assaulted this friend of mind.  Then about 6 months later, there was second chip occurrence again at La Hacienda Ranch and this time I consulted a specialist because this fight really rattled my friend and left her with a wiggle that impacted her confidence.  This specialist said, “Let’s wait and see” and so we did.

Fast forward to about six weeks ago when I met a friend for lunch and I ate another chip which this time resulted in a whole of lot of pain and swelling the following day.  Over the last several years, I would wake with nightmares of losing this friend in my sleep so I made a promise to myself when I woke the next morning that the “let’s wait and see” was over and time to do some professional checking once again.

I took my friend to one doctor and then we were directed to another doctor and we soon learned that my friend wouldn’t be with me much longer in hopes of saving some of our mutual friends in the same area.  We thought we would have until mid-July due to the doctor’s schedule but then last week, we got a call that they could move us up.

Ironically, on Thursday in what would seem an act of mourning, these friends in harms way did some shifting of their own to say goodbye.  The doctor who would help my friend to exit our joined connection told me in my very drugged state that taking my friend now would help keep the others from moving around like they have been.

So now it seems I have a whole in my heart and my smile to try and fill.  Unfortunately, the replacement that was made to fill the space left behind does not yet fit.  Which is really quite appropriate when you consider how long this friend has been with me – something like this shouldn’t be able to have it’s shoes filled so easily.

Steve says you really can’t tell when I smile but the problem is when I talk which those who know me is a lot.   I know the replacement will be adjusted soon and I know that one day when I am whole again in heaven, me and this friend of mine will be together again.

The moral to this story, beware of chips and take care of your friends and they will take care of you.


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